Despite everyone’s best efforts, the Ativan experiment failed. It worked fine during the holidays, but when the stress of this month hit (insomnia while completely obsessing over possible pregnancy and TTC), the drug failed me. Since I was already on a pretty high dose (2mg, three times a day = 6mg total every day), there just wasn’t much room to tweak it. I’m transitioning back to Klonopin.
I’ve come to terms with it. I’m on the same meds and the same dosage that I was on when we started this whole journey. But I tried everything I could safely try. No one has ever tried harder, as my oh-so-patient husband will testify. So, I did what it took for me to know that these meds at these doses are necessary to keep me healthy and (more or less) happy.
I met with my regular psychiatrist last week to put a plan in place for the “cross taper.” I’ll meet with Dr. P, perinatal mental health expert, on Friday to talk it all over with her.
Speaking of, well, this, I am sharing my story on another website! The Feminist Breeder has published an article I wrote called Preparing for a Medicated Pregnancy: Psychiatric Medication and My Preconception Journey on her brand new Resource Guide. Go! Read! Leave a comment! Debates get wonderfully lively over there!
And, to anyone who is visiting from over there, you can read more about me, my family and our journey in these posts:
- My Story, Part I and Part II
- Letter to a Student
- Five Hilarious Things About Having Anxiety
- Best New Thing in the World: The Preconception Checkup
